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Talk about a video that basically has a virus

by michael September 16 2008
Municipal news

Somebody - and this person should probably be kneecapped in public - has turned the gaggle of combina-addled chuckleheads at the Jerusalem Municipality onto the concept of Internet viral videos. It's a solid enough idea, sort of - slap together an amusing video, upload it to YouTube, and wait for the ADD masses of forum kids, the terminally Myspaced, and adults who should know better to pour into the city to drop immeasurable shekels on "I Got Stoned in Jerusalem" T-shirts. But in these matters, execution is everything, and as the development of Jerusalem's genuine-bona-fide-electrified-monorail endlessly proves, execution is not the Municipality's strong point. To wit:

So, in summary: come to Jerusalem, where the sun is hot and the background music that sort of my-karma-ran-over-your-earsma subcontinental Goa groove that swaying, sarong-swaddled, severely hash-blighted Israeli 24-year-olds like to play in their macrobiotic food marts. You'll almost get plowed over by Segways and drench yourself in the effluvia of your own exertion, but don't worry - Zeus will hurl a thunderbolt down upon your head as things get inexplicably Yiddish, and you'll be spic and span just in time for your date with a comb-averse Julia Louis-Dreyfuss clone in terrible sunglasses. Except she will move aside to reveal a portly woman of Mizrachi extraction. Ha-ha! The Jerusalem Municipality foists upon you its apparently undesirable women! Take that, tourist!

Sure, it's a little misogynistic, a little sexist, a little offensive to plus-sized ladies and the many Jerusalem-loving, tax-paying Mizrachi residents of our fair city, and maybe it panders desperately, and maybe it contains no information about the actual cultural offerings in Jerusalem - but as long as 14-year-olds on the Internet with no disposable income are amused, Jerusalemite senses a bright future for local tourism.

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